My Best Worst Day

I was sure that whatever was making my vision a little blurry would be rinsed away in the shower, and I could get on with my day. I had just gotten out of bed. I had to get breakfast, get dressed, and my wife and I had to get our six and three year old daughters off to school so we could each get to work. It was January 23, 2002.

I got into work, and it felt like I was looking through a piece of gray saran wrap. It wasn’t so much that my vision was blurry…it was dull. Whatever I thought would be rinsed away earlier was still there. I had my optometrist take a look. “Larry,” he said, “I want to send you to see someone else. There’s blood in your eye.”

I was in touch with my wife and my boss along the way to let them know what was going on. They were each appropriately concerned, and wanted me to keep in touch.

phoropter

The ophthalmologist pointed bright lights in my eye. Dye was injected into my veins. Snapshots were taken of my eyeball. “I need to do some more tests,” he said, “and I will call you at home tonight, but I think you had a stroke, a retinal vein occlusion.” I was 35 years old.

It was now about 3:00 in the afternoon, and I was close enough to work that I stopped in to check my voice mail (yes, we still did that in 2002). My boss was happy to see me, and was very sorry to hear I may have had a stroke.

I went to my office, and the director of Human Resources stopped in to see me. “Larry, I heard there was something wrong with your eye. Are you OK?” I explained everything that happened that day, and that I was sure I would be just fine.

But then she didn’t leave. She just stood in the doorway of my office.

“Is there something else I can do for you?” I asked.

“I’m here to let you go” she said.

Only four months after the horrific events of 9/11, our company was struggling as were so many other companies. Some of my friends had lost their job earlier that week. After working at the company for nine years, it was now my turn.

I have told this story dozens of times, and always the first response is “…and they still let you go? Even though they knew you had a stroke?!?”

Yes, they still let me go, and good for them for doing so. I was not bed-ridden, and they had to trim their staff rolls to remain a viable business. They gave me severance, out-placement support, and health insurance for several months. They did the right thing, for the right reasons, in the right way. And what a gift that was.

I could not be very concerned about my job loss, because I was so concerned about my vision. On the other other hand, I could not be very concerned about my vision because I was so concerned about finding my next job. My concerns cancelled each out quite nicely, thank you very much.

I was out of work for 13 months. As difficult as that time was, and as much as I did not want to be out of work, I came out ahead in almost every way.

  1. I got to spend more time with my daughters. I was able to be present, available and involved in ways that are so much more challenging when work took me away from home for 9 hours a day.
  2. Much to my surprise, I found that I enjoyed networking. I was good at it. I was fearless. I called people I did not know, and they actually met with me. I learned a lot about other people, and about myself. It was as a direct result of my networking efforts then that I am in the career I am in now, over 15 years later.
  3. I was more prudent in the way I spent money, and my wife was a vigilant bookkeeper. I did not need gas for a commute, I did not need to buy lunches with co-workers at the office. And while I did not enjoy collecting unemployment checks, somehow we got by, and we found ourselves still financially healthy by the time I went back to work.
  4. My wife and I have always been there for each other, but perhaps never more so than during my time out of work. She was there to support me, there to believe in me, there to encourage me. Her love and support felt nothing short of unconditional.

15 years later, I am in a career that I love, my family life is strong and happy, and I wear eyeglasses. I continue to try to grow and improve as a father, husband and professional every day, and I know I would not be where I am now in work or at home had it not been for the events of that very best of worst days.

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